An Emotional Process

Since John Breen is likely the only one to see this, I shan't worry about posting hastily and then revising later. Here it is, post haste:

I find I am angry at my brother. This is quite possibly the first time I have been solidly and definitely angry with him, at least in my memory. I am so angry that I cannot handle him being out with his friends and spending time with his girlfriend rather than with me. I 'have it out' with him and tell him how I feel. That apparently isn't enough and we do the same the next day after I've sought counsel from a friend. Two weeks later I find I am still left with repressed emotions and a deep feeling of angst. What do I do with this? I cannot chop wood, Joanna, for I have not the tools nor the skill. I have a good talk with my sister - no, I should not hate my brother, because he is being like Jesus - spending time with those who need him, who need someone to be their friend. He is doing the right thing. But I still feel a latent anger and bitterness. This morning Z makes it all clear. Anger is not the primary emotion. The primary emotion is, in fact, pain. I experience pain and disappointment because I had high expectations of the time we would be able to spend together because of previous promises made by my brother. But since we do not like to stay in pain, Z says, we move on to anger. And, what's more, we become demanding. Suddenly the tables have shifted and my priorities are revealed. I think it is all about me and that my brother should spend time with me and fulfill my needs and deepest longings for significance and security. That is what transforms my pain into anger. Otherwise, I would feel pain, and justly feel it, and tell my brother and seek solace in Christ. How does one seek solace in Christ? Is prayer the only means? Prayer and contemplation, perhaps? I am not entirely sure. What do you think?

Everybody's doing it

Jane had this on her xanga because Holly had this on her facebook, so it is appearing on my blog.

Rules :
Turn on Google & look for the following expressions. Be mature & use your real name. Use the first thing that appears & makes sense

Q. Put "[your name] needs" on Google
A. Princess Alexandra needs to steal Mary's stylist.

Q. Put "[your name] looks like" on Google
A. A Venn diagram of my love for Alexandra looks like this:

Q. Put "[your name] says" on Google"
A. Derek Alexandra says our sharing ratio will be 50:50 should incase if I am interested Nigerian Scam Scavenger Hunt.

Q. Put "[your name] wants" on Google
A. Alexandra wants the Camera!

Q. Put "[your name] does" on Google
A. Name: Alexandra Does Not Approve ...

Q. Put "[your name] hates" on Google
A. Clothes Alexandra Hates: Modo (mid style), Russian (low style);

Q. Put "[your name] asks" on Google
A. ALEXANDRA ASKS LOYALTY FOR SON And, "from the Depth of Her Broken Heart," Begs Nation's Prayers.

Q. Put "[your name] becomes" on Google
A. Big Brother Housemate Amy Alexandra becomes the ninth housemate to be...

Q. Put "[your name] likes" on Google
A. Alexandra likes to pose in front of a nice chess set ...

Q. Put "[your name] eats" on Google
A. Alexandra Eats with Factory Girls and Children in the East End of London.

Q. Put "[your name] wears" on Google
A. "Queen Alexandra wears a Cartier necklace in 1910. She was famous for wearing high chokers in the style shown and for wearing a daring amount of make-up, ...

Q. Put "[your name] was arrested for" on Google
A. Alexandra was arrested for kicking a girl in a drunken night out in Croydon...

The GRE and the Angst of a Philosopher

"You'll do better on the GRE by putting aside your feelings about real education and surrendering yourself to the strange logic of the standardized test."

Cracking the GRE, 21.

On a completely unrelated note, as a philosopher I often feel angst. The question is: how to express it without freaking anybody out and yet feeling a sense of release or satisfaction afterward?

Presocratics

First we shall begin with a tribute to Thomas Aquinas, the composer of the first limerick (according to metre), so saith Wikipedia. Anyway, it's in Latin.

Sit vitiorum meorum evacuatio
Concupiscentae et libidinis exterminatio,
Caritatis et patientiae,
Humilitatis et obedientiae,
Omniumque virtutum augmentatio.


Oh, look, it's all ancient looking, too. I mean, really, who uses Courier nowadays? And how do you figure out what font you were using before you change it? I obviously wasn't using Times New Roman before.

Anyway, now the Pre-Socratic Limericks.

Prelude

A couple of men from Miletus
Said ‘why does everyone hate us?
We just sought to find
The substance that binds
And not let our minds take hiatus’

Triduum

The first Anatolian was Thales
Who rejected all notion of Hades
Instead to explain
All things he took rain
As the substance beneath (even daisies)

Anaximander, he was a Greek man
Who thought Thales was terribly bland
'Water? No, no.
To the boundless we'll go!'
Was the shout that he gave as he ran

Anaximenes did not really care
For his compatriots and their love of flare
Instead he preferred
That the base of a turd
Be the whimsical substance called air.


Eleatics

Parmenides came from Elea
Not believing in what he could see-a
He disbelieved change
Thought Heraclitus strange
Trusting reason to explain diahrrea


Other options?

A Sicilian was the first Captain Planet
Thinking fire, water, air, and granite
Were the four that combined
In love. So refined
Was Empedocles he never would can it

A philosopher from Athens was banished
For the whole was seemingly vanished
And seen in a part.
He was terribly smart,
Anaxagoras who ended up famished

To Blog or Not to Blog?

An unoriginal title, I am sure, but oh well, the question remains. Ought I to have a blog as John Breen so adamantly insists? Or should I shun his words of advice and continue on my merry blogless way? After all, I still have xanga. So what if xanga is, in John's words anyway, 'so middle school'? So what if no one except for Jane and I read it? And anyway, why should I post on a blog in the first place? Sure I have thoughts on things, but why should I thrust them upon the world, unwanted, unread, unappreciated? I suppose it would cause me to be a bit more organised in my thoughts and it would force me to think deeper about things. Hm. Well, anyway, I'm not going to create a new blog in any case. I shall simply keep this one. I created it accidentally, anyway, so I might as well use it.

The next post shall be: Pre-Socratic limericks.

Accidental Randomness

Without entirely meaning to, I have founded a blog with the purpose of sharing literary creations. Sharing is not the entire purpose, as criticism and discussion are also welcome. I originally merely wanted to create an account so that I could join the inklings blog, but then I realized that the inklings blog may not be the most appropraite place to post my poems if I wanted comments. So, this separate space is dedicated to poets, fiction writers, and story writers of all kinds. And it is dedicated to all taken in by the poetry.com scam.